the 36-year-old woman illustrated

While looking for something completely different on the internet this evening, I came upon some pictures from The Last Sitting by Bert Stern.  "Last sitting" as in this was the last official photo shoot that Marilyn Monroe ever did, taken only weeks before she died at the age of 36 in 1962.

Wait, 36?

I'm 36.

I went through a short but strong Marilyn Monroe phase in high school.  She was sexy, classy, funny...everything I wanted to be.  She was also lonely, fragile and misunderstood...everything that I was.

I read biographies left and right, watched almost all of her movies, listened to the songs that she had recorded, and imitated some of her style.  Well, what I could as a high school student in the early 90's anyway.  

I never believed her death to be a suicide.  There was a small part of me that wanted to believe the conspiracy theories that the Kennedys were involved and killed her off to keep her from talking (mainly because I never liked the Kennedys), but most of me believed, and still does, that it was an accidental overdose of prescription drugs.  We're all too familiar with that these days.

Why didn't I go along with the "probable suicide" cause of death given by the coroner?  Because she was going through a renaissance of sorts.  She was going back to work, taken up her acting lessons again, lost weight, and was ready to do things on her own terms, not just do what the studios wanted her to do.  She wasn't giving up - she was starting over.  She still had problems - big problems - but she was taking steps in the right direction.

I think many of us go through some sort of rebirth at this age.  We're at a point in our lives where we're no longer the young crowd, but we're not middle-aged yet either. We see what we used to be, what we wanted to be, where we are now, and decide if we like our current direction or if it's time to make changes.

The photos that Mr. Stern took of Marilyn at this point in her life conveyed many of the different aspects in the life of a 36-year-old woman.

The mature woman, beginning to age just a little

The vibrant woman who loves to smile and laugh and have fun

The woman who is a very sexual being, comfortable with herself, making some improvements, but still living easily in her skin

And the woman who sometimes feels like the weight of the world is on her shoulders

I had never identified with photos the way I did with these.  So many facets, all so real, all so easy to relate to - even with the fancy clothes and accessories, bright lights and huge amounts of makeup.

Marilyn wasn't able to see what her changes would have brought her,

but I can't wait to see what my own renaissance will bring.

All photos were taken over a three-day period in June 1962 by Bert Stern for Vogue magazine.  The complete set of images is available in the book Marilyn Monroe: The Complete Last Sitting.