year 37

Monday was my birthday.  My 37th birthday.  Talk about a blah number.  It's not really mid thirties, but it's not late thirties either.  It's right in between the two.  Late-mid?  Early-late?

Anyhooters, I'm a firm believer that nobody should have to work on his or her birthday.  It's a personal holiday.  Think about all of the birthdays that are national holidays - well, don't you think yours is a little more important in your own little world?  What do you do on President's Day...really? Have your day to do whatever the hell you want to do.  Sleep in, eat crap, go places, stay home in your pajamas.  It's all about you!

So, I took the day off, got my kid off to school, meditated for an extra-long time, had a very tasty breakfast courtesy of the hubby, then drove to the place I only get to once a year...

Long John Silver's!!!

My birthday is the only excuse I can think of for the amount of grease ingested in just one plate of food.


Arrrrgh, matey!  Greasy goodness.

A handful of french fries, two hush puppies, and two beautiful golden-brown filets of fish deep-fried in salty, crispy, oily goodness.  But the best part of the whooooole thing...

Buried treasure

The crispies!!!

Tiny little particles of fried batter that, when eaten, drop right to the bottom of your gut and somehow expand to the point where it feels like 20 pounds of lead is sitting there...for hours.  It's like tasty, torturous magic!

After savoring the fish, inhaling the crispies and eating only half of the fries, I decided my body just couldn't take any more, and I went back home.  I spent most of the rest of the day relaxing, hanging out with family and eating an amazing dinner prepared, once again, by the glorious hubby.  Other than occasionally getting bummed out that I had to go back to work on Tuesday, it was a great day.

My thoughts on the year ahead?  Well, much will be the same, but the good stuff will only get better.  I'm not feeling like I'm in my late-mid thirties, more like my mid-early thirties and I intend on acting like I'm in my late-mid twenties instead. 

Got that?

frigidity necessities

On cold Wisconsin nights like this one:

I find that there are some things I need in order to feel warm and cozy.

#1: Mukluks.  

I love these things.  They keep my feet all toasty warm on the cold floor.  

#2: My hubby's gigantic sweatshirt.

I bought it for him for last year's Super Bowl.  I wear it more than he does.  It's thick, soft, and 2 1/2 sizes too big for me.  In essence - perfect.

#3: Hair pulled back into a ponytail.

Gotta keep the static-charged hair out of my face.  No tickles, no snarls, don't have to worry about a thing.

#4: The fireplace.

Fireplace, a good book, watching the snow come down outside.  Ahhhhh....can you hear my stresses melt away?

#5: Whiskey

Gotta warm the insides too!

And people wonder why we actually enjoy living in Wisconsin....

i'm officially a twit

I've done it.  I've decided to join the millions of people on Twitter.  Why?  I have no idea.  I guess I just want to be like the cool people. 

I probably won't be doing a whole ton of tweeting for fear that my husband will divorce me, but I'll chime in from time to time. 

Feel free to follow me @GoddessR_75

winter is coming

No, I'm not talking about the weather.  In fact, winter has finally arrived after dragging its feet to get here.  Today we're living with wind chills below zero and tomorrow we're due for 5"-7" of snow.  We're all January-y here.  No, I'm talking about the winter of my existence.  It's starting to show its ugly head.

A couple of years ago, I noticed my first gray hair.  I can handle one or two, no problem.  Unfortunately in the past few months I've noticed more and more springing up.  In clusters.  In fact, when I pull my hair back (which I tend to do quite often with long hair), these clusters of grey hair are as visible as a hunter in the woods wearing blaze orange.  They scream, "You can't miss us!  Look at her - she's getting old!  Neener, neener, neener!" and every time I look in the mirror I can hear them laughing at me.  They mock me because even though I'm feeling younger and better than I have in years and years, I can't fight time, I'm still getting closer to 40 and there's not a damn thing I can do about it.

So now I'm toying with the idea of coloring my hair.  Again.  I went through a few years of it when I decided to change things up a bit and go auburn instead of the dark blond than I am naturally.  After auburn I went for a ginger color with highlights which I really liked but they discontinued.  (Damn you, L'Oreal!)  The only thing is that now once I start I won't be able to stop...ever.  I'll have to continue covering those damn things until the end of time...or until I'm completely gray and the thought of that makes me want to puke.  I guess I don't really know if they're as noticeable to other people as they are to me.  I'm blond and they blend in a little better than if I had jet black hair, but they're there.  I keep thinking that other people see them and think they're highlights.  Gray, coarse highlights.

Today as I looked in the mirror I noticed that my face has a few more creases in it than it used to.  If I raise and lower my eyebrows, the lines it creates in my forehead seem to linger.  They don't bounce right back the way they used to.  Upon closer inspection, I also noticed fine lines at the corners of my eyes.  And laugh lines.  Freaking laugh lines! Now that the wrinkles have started, how long will it take until I look like this?

So, what, now I have to get Botox injections in order for me to look the same age as I feel?  Crap!   What else can I do to get rid of these things?  $100 wrinkle creams?  I refuse to buy anything called "wrinkle cream."  It reminds me of going through my grandmother's bathroom looking at all of her beauty products.  She was old...and had a ton of wrinkles.



"I will never get old as long as I'm moist"

Vain?  Sure.  I admit it.  When I looked great, I didn't feel great and now that I'm feeling great, I'd like to look it too.  Is it really that much to ask?

Bring on the plastic surgery prize - I think I'm gonna need it now. 
 
 

very disappointed!!!

Ugh!  My men disappointed me yesterday.  I had such high hopes for the day -I was going to watch the Packers in the playoffs, the Golden Globe Awards were on and I was sure to see a few of my favorites.  And I did.  And things didn't turn out quite the way I had hoped...with either event.

First the Packer game.  Frankly, it was ugly.  Offense, defense, special teams...ugly.  Don't get me wrong - they still had a great season, it was just a bad time to have a bad game.  They had 2-3 people on Clay Matthews for the whole game so he wasn't able to really do anything.  Except for get hurt.  Well, for a minute anyway.  When he came limping off of the field, my husband looked at me and said, "See, he's not a god after all."  I reminded him that I never claimed he was a god...just a demi-god.  All he'd have to do is walk it off and then he'd be all better...and sure enough, that's what happened.  But, still....no win.

Disappointment #1

Okay.  Moving on...  The Golden Globes were bound to cheer me up.  My favorite actors from tv and movies drinking, cavorting, being made fun on by Ricky Gervais.  Not nearly as stuffy as the Oscars and there's usually a good looking guy or two for me to drool over.  So the awards start, Ricky is mildly funny, and then he introduces none other than Johnny Depp.  Hooray!  I could swoon!  

Disappointment #2

Or not.  Um...  I don't see a single appealing thing about the man in this picture.  Sure, he's still unique and bad-ish, but the uber-tan and the mumbling weren't positives.  I kept looking at him like, "Now, why did I find him attractive?"  I think it's time for me to say goodbye to Mr. Depp.  (Until I find another good picture, I'm sure)

Ugh, okay.  But who is this that appears now?  Why, it's Robert Downey Jr.  Looking all dapper.  He'll have something witty to say, make some great smarmy joke.  Thank goodness!

Disappointment #3

Or not.  Snooze....

Thank goodness the one and only man who really matters to me was still there.  Being awesome.  And cute.  (Yay, hubby!) 'Cause the male population who I don't know on any sort of personal basis whatsoever were very disappointing.

how a simple prize turns into madness

As I was in the shower this morning, I remembered a story that I had read about a woman who had won free plastic surgery at a casino somewhere and decided to turn it down.  (Yes, I do some of my best thinking in the shower.)  Then I thought why turn it down?  You might as well use it. Even if it's something minor, it's still free! 

So then I was trying to figure out what I would use it on if I had won that prize.  The two ideas that came to mind were pretty minor.  First thought was a little tummy tuck on the c-section pudge that just doesn't want to go away.  My other thought was maybe a bit of a lift in the chestal area.  Not an increase, just a lift.  Gravity is beginning to set in a bit.  But with each of these answers, a whole new line of thought began. 

If I was to get a tummy tuck, it would be out of proportion to other parts of my body that need toning.   Clothes would probably fit weird.  I would never get the results in places like my arms and thighs as quickly as I'd want to, so I'd want to get a little lipo to take care of that.  And then take care of the extra skin in my arms once the flab is gone.  (I wouldn't want wings like Star Jones in Family Guy.) More fat-suckage, less working out.  Fast, easy solutions...nothing healthy, one body part after another.




Okay, so let's skip the tummy and go for the important part.  The boobs.  Just a little lift.  Nothing wrong about that.  Of course, while they're there, they could even out the size a little bit.  One's just a little bigger than the other (as is the case in most non-augmented women), and it irks me.  Quick and easy little fix.  Of course with those puppies looking the way I want them, I'll start noticing the other things about me that are looking a little droopy or not-so-firm that should be lifted or tightened.  I'll end up getting botox and a bit of the jowls taken off of my face and maybe do a little something to the nose that I've come to accept but have never really liked.  I'll keep finding more and more that needs to be "fixed" or "tweaked" that it will be never-ending.  I'll end up looking like Joan Rivers or Kenny Rogers or (insert name of any) Jackson or, or....this chick:

Now I understand why the lady turned down her prize.  Sometimes it's better to leave well enough alone.

filling internet space with a whole lotte nuthin'

Hello friends!  I apologize for the delay in posting anything.  I've started a few posts that never really went anywhere.  One was a little poetic verse about the full moon we just had.  (Never finished it.  Couldn't put the right words together.)  Another was an ode to eye candy and how it doesn't make you fat.  (Nice pictures to look at, but not much else.)  The last was about something that happened to me twenty years ago that for some reason popped into my head and really shook me up.  I started writing about it on here, but then decided that it probably shouldn't be out there on the interweb and decided to use good old fashioned pen and paper instead.  We can discuss after a few drinks sometime.

So here the blog sits with nothing new to report.  I suppose I could go on about how we're finally getting our first snow of the season and people are making it sound like it's the end of the world.  Even that is cliche.  I've got nothing.  It's kind of sad.  I need inspiration!

I guess all I can do for now is post one of the pictures that was meant for the eye candy post.  Don't say I never gave you anything.


Why can't football players play dressed like this? 
Imagine how the ratings would skyrocket with the rise in female viewers!
(Or even a different demographic of male viewers.)



Or maybe this picture instead:



I seem to see some sort of long blond hair trend here. 
Crap.
I hate being trendy.



Okay - let's break that mold.



Hello Hamm!

 Okay, I'm done now.    Have a good day and hopefully I'll be back with something more entertaining later.

let's play a game this year

Hello 2012!   I embrace you with open arms!

Oh, wait...the end of the world is supposed to happen at the end of the year.  Dang, I guess I should be paranoid and scared and start coming to terms with my mortality. 


Damn you Mayans for deciding to end a calendar at some point instead of going on infinitely.

Nah.

Well, hold on a minute.  You know that game people always play, "What would you do if you knew you had less than a year to live?"  Maybe we should all play that game.  And maybe we should actually do those things - you know...just in case.  Well, as long as they don't involve spending all of your money or harming anyone else.  I mean, if the world goes on to December 22nd and you're out of money and you've done something really stupid, there are no Groundhog Day-esque resets.  You're screwed.

But if you've accomplished a whole bunch of goals you thought were unattainable or did those things on your bucket list that you never imagined you'd ever get around to doing, how awesome would that be?  Go on - Tell people what you've been wanting to tell them for a long time, figure out some way to get to that city you've always wanted to get to, laugh more, spend more time with your friends, go skydiving, learn another language, take pole dancing lessons, have a whole ton of (safe) sex, take a little money (or a lot) and donate it to a good cause, hug people more often, volunteer at the local animal shelter, try new foods.  And above all, enjoy every minute of it! 

I made a couple of goals for myself.  One's completely new and crazy and will take some work, but I know I can do it.  Another is taking care of something that's been on my list of things to do for far too long.  Maybe I'll even take a little trip somewhere.  I'm also planning on seeing my friends more often, laughing with my son as much as possible now before he gets all teen angsty and emo, and dancing more often - even if it's in my kitchen or living room. 

I'll be able to look back on 2012 as a great life-changing year and try to top it in 2013.  And in the off chance that the world does somehow go POOF on December 21st, at least I'll die happy.

Please forgive me for posting a Britney Spears video. It just seemed to fit.

Also forgive me if this song gets stuck in your head the same way it's gotten stuck in mine...again.

give me the strength to make it through another election year

Another presidential election year is upon us.  Oh gods above, below, and in all directions please help us.  Time to be inundated with political commercials about nothing but how bad the other candidates are, news hours, internet space, and plenty of ink devoted to each and every candidate, letting us know what they said, how they flubbed, what they ate for dinner, and what color undershirt they prefer, but not telling us where they really stand on any issue.  The spin, the soundbites, the mud-slinging, the Vaseline-coated smiles...

Oh, I don't think I can do it again.

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Last night, I received eight - EIGHT -  "Breaking News" updates in my email about the Iowa Caucuses.  They were coming in "With 50% of the votes in..." followed a little while later with, "With 67% of the votes in..." etc.  What?  Couldn't they just tell me who won when it was all over with? 

Today I had three "Breaking News" updates about Bachmann...First one at 9:26am
"Source close to Michele Bachmann campaign: No 'viable way forward' after sixth-place finish in Iowa."
The second at 9:42am
"Rep. Michele Bachmann will announce Wednesday she's suspending her GOP campaign for president, a source tells CNN."
The third at 10:36am
"Michele Bachmann announced today she is dropping out of the presidential race, saying 'I have decided to stand aside.'"

It was then that I decided once and for all that CNN and I have very differing views on what Breaking News really is, and I unsubscribed.

Front runners are determined a year before the election even takes place?  Debates become a show of who can throw out the right soundbites as opposed to giving straight answers?  How is anyone supposed to make informed decisions in this overly-packaged swamp of "coverage?"

In the perfect election year in my head, the candidates would give you the information you want.  They would give interviews, only being asked questions about policy and where they stand on issues, they would only be allowed to answer the question as asked and not mention where their political rivals stand.  Same goes with public debates.  The only news coverage given to the candidates would be these interviews, debates, and election results (when the votes have all been counted).  There would be no Super PACs, no "I'm so-and-so and I endorse this message," no phone calls during dinner.  Simple yard signs, bumper stickers and the like would be it.  We, the voters, would have the information we need to make intelligent decisions based on our own opinions - and we wouldn't have to sift through all the waste to get to it. 

Oh that sounds so refreshing.

Unfortunately it's my little dreamworld and it's nowhere near reality.  I guess I'll be fast-forwarding through every commercial, rolling my eyes at the internet headlines, and trying desperately to find the information I need to make a sound decision.  And I'll stay well-stocked on whiskey.

relax, it's new year's day

Ah, New Year's Day.  The one day a year when being hung over is almost expected.  I'm not sure I fall into that category this year or not.  I have a headache and am a little dizzy and tired, but I also have a mild cold that seems to have settled in my sinuses and inner ear area.  It could be either one, but because I only had a whopping two  - count 'em: one, two - drinks last night, I just can't believe that I'd be feeling this "off" because of those.  I'm not that old.  I will have to say it's the cold.

There are two simple rules that our family follows on this day every year:

Meals are not cooked.  The only foods we eat are appetizers.  Today's selections are cheese, sausage and crackers for breakfast at the beginning of the football game, pizza rolls for lunch during halftime, and chili dip for "dinner" a little later on.  This is a tradition that began when my parents threw huge New Year's Eve parties and we spent days in the kitchen preparing a ton of food, so there was no way we were cooking anything.  Plus we had tons of leftovers to eat the next day.

We do not get dressed or go anywhere.  We're tired.  We want to be comfortable.  Once upon a time, I just stayed in my pajamas all day, but now because of my desire to be clean and take a shower, I end up putting on sweats and other comfy clothes to lounge in all day.  We need something from the store?  Tough.  Should have thought of that a couple of days ago.

I hope you had a fun-filled evening last night whether it was out at a party or home with family and that your holiday is quiet and somewhat dark so you can nurse that hangover.  Oh, and here's a little guide to help you feel better today:

via visual.ly